A Moment with My Son

Driving home from work the other day I was reflecting on some frustration my wife and I have had over our oldest son. I quickly realized that our frustration centered around that fact that he is still very selfish. At almost nine years old he has not learned to love or be relational as Christ has called us to. In part, this is because I am selfish and have only just begun to understand that faith is as much about our relationships as it is about our believing. I am so sad that Luke has caught on to my relational ineptness and selfish attitudes. I pray it is not too late to show him another way - God way of relating and loving. 

As I continued to drive I began to wonder what I would say to Luke, my oldest son if I had only one chance to capture his heart and understanding for a moment. Perhaps you can relate to the kind of moment I am talking about. Perhaps you can still visualize a moment you had as a kid when your parent or another adult said or did something that will always stick with you. For example, my dad was always very complimenting of my mom and her cooking and yet one time my dad looked at my mom across the table and with all the sincerity that is possible he thanked her for making us the meal were eating. I am not sure why this particular moment was forever embedded in my mind but talk about life change for me. After that I was very conscious of thanking those who provided meals for me. I also swore that I would not be picky about what I would eat but would be grateful just to have food set before me. To this day I will eat nearly anything set before me and if I don't like it I am still able to very grateful for it. (so why on earth are both of my kids so darn picky?)

Back to my son. If I could have one moment that I was promised would be etched into his mind for life what would I say. Honestly, I did not have to give this much thought because I would say to him what is very much on my heart. 

Luke - you must learn how to love people and how to do relationships well! Relationships will be the hardest thing in life you will ever have to strive with and for but do it and do it well. 

Now, If I were to continue my thoughts in a brief letter to him here is what I would say. In fact I do believe I will share this very letter with him when he gets old enough to understand more. For now I will stick with just sharing the more condensed version above.

Luke,

God has not simply called you to have private set of beliefs. He has called you to a kingdom, His own kingdom, a relational kingdom. This kingdom is distinctive of God's own character and is marked by love. It is not love as the world understands. Love as God demonstrates is the ability to lay aside self - so much so that you would die even for your enemy. Love as God demonstrates is speaking the truth even when it holds the possibility of bringing relational or emotional hurt and pain to your own life. Love as God demonstrates is not the absence of caring about self but is the state of heart whereby you think of self less and others more. God has called us to share in fellowship with Him through the Holy Spirit. He has called us to be one with other believers and share life with them as He shares His life with us as one people called by His name. He has called us to invite others to share in this kingdom.

In this world there is little love and few are willing to identify and stop conforming to the pattern of this world so that they can enter into God's rhythms and pattern of life. You too will be tempted and even more so than I for America is only becoming more selfish and less loving. You will be tempted to put "living a comfortable lifestyle" over and above your family. Satan will lie to you and tell you that you are working so hard and accumulating things for the sake of your family. My son do not listen to the evil one for if you wish the best for your family then choose time with them; choose to lead them in Biblical rhythms. You will be tempted to put those things your flesh desires (entertainment, lusts and isolation) over relationships. Satan will lie to you and say “but if I only give in a little here and there I will still have time for relationships.” Do not listen to the father of lies for he will rob you of true relationships and will leave you only with surface relationships. 

Seek the Kingdom of God first; seek for the fellowship of Spirit. Satan will tell you that the Holy Spirit is nothing. He will teach you a theology of the flesh leading you to believe that the Spirit of God no longer operates with power, creative order and sharing. Ask of God to shut the wolf’s mouth for indeed God Spirit as given to his children marks you as part of His kingdom. While many may not experience the power of the Spirit, should we then call God a liar and consider His Spirit ineffective and inactive? Seek God's kingdom, God's rhythms. Ask God to teach you and help you how to love as He loves. People will hurt you; perhaps people will kill your body as they did Jesus Christ's. That did not stop Him from loving - may it not stop you from loving. 

It saddens my heart that I have been such a wretched example of God’s love and relational way. But I am not done yet - not until God says so. Thus, for as long as I have I will strive with you to love others and do relationships well. I will cry with you when Biblical love hurts and the imperfect nature of man scorns you. I will rejoice with you when we sip upon the glory of God and experience the fellowship of sharing, order and power that He has promised. I will exalt God with you when we participate in Christ's love through our relationships with others. I will cry out in anger with you every time God's love is taking in vain. Luke - you must learn how to love people and how to do relationships well! Relationships will be the hardest thing in life you will ever have to strive with and for but do it and do it well. 

Dad